


Memory

by ontaemin



Category: SHINee
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, fake deep Kim Kibum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-15
Updated: 2016-04-15
Packaged: 2018-06-02 11:47:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6564889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ontaemin/pseuds/ontaemin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If they fit together so well, then why have they never done this before?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memory

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! I'm back again with another SHINee fic, of course, this time: Jongkey! Oddly enough, Jongkey and Taekey are not my first choice when it comes to SHINee fics (I'd say I don't have an OTP, but I think I'm growing very fond of Ontae, Onew and Taemin being my biases and all) so I find it a bit funny that they're my first SHINee fics. But it's never a bad thing! Hopefully I'll be back soon with some Ontae for you guys, I think that might be in awhile though, because I want to write something a bit longer for them ~. Anyways I hope you guys enjoy this little fic, the weather has been so odd lately it reminds me of the start of fall, despite it being April, so I just had to write something. Feedback is always appreciated ^^. Enjoy ~ ! xo.

Jonghyun's toes are freezing. Kibum sighs.

"It feels lonely here." The younger boy muses, kicking his feet in the water as they sit on the dock. "I thought it would be nice - with the warm weather and all, but I feel sad." He says quietly. "I'm not too sure why."

Jonghyun nods. "Yeah." He offers, not too sure how to respond to Kibum's odd manner of speaking. 

It was too cold to swim. The air was warm - hot even. Sticky, August humidity clung to Jonghyun's exposed calves and arms as they walked from where the group had been eating dinner, dead silence between the two. With sweat beading on his neck, Jonghyun figured it would be okay to stick his feet in the water to cool down, and he did so, only to come back with numb toes and a snide remark from Kibum about "always being such a baby". Kibum claimed he was overreacting and slid his shoes off to test the water for himself, never believing anything Jonghyun told him unless he experienced it first hand. Jonghyun swore the water was cold - frigid even despite the weeks prevailing heat - and Kibum was just persevering to prove a point. He was like that. But Jonghyun didn't pay mind to it. He folded his legs and let Kibum kick his feet in the water as they chatted, cold droplets occasionally landing on Jonghyun's shins.

It wasn't odd for Kibum to have asked him to come out with him, but definitely unexpected. Kibum didn't seem like he kind of person to waste a Sunday night doing nothing productive or exciting. For the short period of time Jonghyun knew him all he had learned was that the kid was ambitious. With Kibum it was always go go go - get it done and get it done right. Kibum would stop at nothing until what he was working on was perfect, so it seemed odd to Jonghyun that someone so ambitious wanted to waste his night at the beach, and with Jonghyun of all people. But Jonghyun wasn't a man to say no to wasting time at the beach, so he walked with Kibum down the road to the orange horizon. 

Maybe he liked Kibum, Jonghyun thought as pavement transformed into sand under his feet. He sat down with the taller boy boy, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't find a reason in the world to explain how they hadn't ever considered each other as friends before. They had always spent time with each other when their friends hung out - when Jinki dragged Jonghyun over to Minho's to play video games, and Kibum was always happy to see Jonghyun and to catch up, but somehow that excitement never transformed into a strong friendship. Somehow without Jinki dragging Jonghyun somewhere if felt impossible for Jonghyun to call and ask to hang out, as much as he desperately wanted to. It seemed odd, Jonghyun thought, because the two seemed so horribly perfect for each other, able to talk so freely and happily even after knowing each other for only a moment. The others gawked at how well the two got on. The group conversations turned into Kibum and Jonghyun talking about god knows what, and Jinki, Minho and Taemin rolling their eyes and telling the two to get a room. As Kibum shifted his weight to lean back onto the palms of his hands - still going on about how the sight of sun against water and water against his legs made him feel melancholy and upset, or something - Jonghyun couldn't figure out why the hell he hadn't hung out with him alone sooner. Sure, the guy was weird, but wasn't Jonghyun? Perhaps they were perfect for each other, Jonghyun though, a quiet smile pulling across as Kibum continued the rapid fire delivery of his thoughts, not holding back one bit. 

By the time the sky was dark the two were finishing each other's sentences. And Jonghyun though, yeah, he definitely liked Kibum. 

As the sun dove under the water, Jonghyun watched Kibum's expression evolve, so interested in the beauty of the sky and the water, so deep in thought he forgot he was in public, forgot to slouch his shoulders and hide himself from world like any unassuming student would. He felt comfortable - relaxed as Jonghyun wrapped an arm around his slender shoulders - and he smiled, closing his eyes to sink back into Jonghyun's grasp

Jonghyun thought he might get it, maybe. He wasn't too sure if Kibum was making any sense with his musings but he felt like he understood a bit of what he was saying. Jonghyun didn't lack his own idiosyncrasies, often times he was told he was being too dramatic or too "deep" for the moment, chastised and made fun of by the group for saying something that just came so naturally to him, but Kibum's philosophies seemed much different than Jonghyun's inherent poetic comments. He didn't really have the capacity to understand something that hadn't come out of his own brain, but tried. For Kibum, he tried to understand, and maybe he got somewhere. It did feel lonely. Empty, almost. Perhaps it was the looming air of the semester starting in a few weeks, feeling like the summer was wasted and shorter than the one that preceded it. Perhaps it was because it was a Sunday, and nothing felt real on Sunday. Or it could be because Jonghyun had been skirting around his feelings for Kibum for quite some time now, never taking the time to think about why he was so nervous to call and ask to hang out with someone so suited for him. If they fit together so well, they why have they never done this before?

Kibum had singled him out tonight - brought him to watch the sunset with him and rested his head on Jonghyun shoulder as he breathed in the scent of his cologne very obviously. He looked up at Jonghyun with those piercing eyes and made it all feel so much more like a dream. Jonghyun smiled back, weakly. 

Kibum closed his eyes, leaning back into Jonghyun's grip and yawning as the final beam of light dipped beneath the black water. "I like you." He says with the last of the yawn. Jonghyun hears the waves crash and his heart beat - Kibum's breath and the sound of his toes splashing gently in the water still, and Kibum's soft voice, like never before. Jonghyun hears him, "I hope you're not sad." Is what Kibum says to him. "I feel lonely right now, but I don't think it has anything to do with you." Kibum slits one eye open, quirking a brow up - such an emotive face. "I'm not bringing you down, am I?" He asks. 

"No." Jonghyun lies, still unsure as to why his stomach seems to turn while he stares into the water. Maybe Kibum was onto something after all. "Why don't we ever spend time together?"

"I don't know." Kibum says poignantly, opening his eyes to examine the now boring sky, clouding over on the horizon. His smile fades, everything interesting across the water has disappeared in only seconds, so he moves his eyes back to Jonghyun as he sits up. "I guess we just never thought of it." He says, a little distracted by gathering his sweater up off the dock to pull around his shoulders, suddenly chilly without the sunlight. Kibum leans his elbows against his thighs and pauses on his next thought. "I don't want next semester to start." He says softly. Jonghyun would have laughed, because who does? But the tone in Kibum's voice makes his stomach lurch. 

"Neither do I." He says, attempting to sound sympathetic. Kibum doesn't respond. "Uh, are you okay, though? You're not going to throw yourself off the roof of the biology building are you? Because you're way too pretty to go that way." Jonghyun continues, snorting out a laughs that comes out way more cynical than he expected. Kibum's gaze flicks back to Jonghyun. "That was gruesome, sorry, I can never shut up when I'm nervous."

Kibum gives a weak laugh - a breath of air through his nose with a smirk. "It's fine." He says softly, voice mumbled because of his hand supporting his jaw. "It's cute."

"It's really not." Jonghyun laughs awkwardly, recalling all the times he was said something funny during a conversation really ment to be kept serious. "But thanks for the sentiment."

Kibum doesn't say anything after that, still caught up in his thoughts and the slowly blackening water. Jonghyun's stomach turns as he runs over the conversation in his head, picking out what went wrong and replaying it until he feels like sinking to the bottom of the ocean is a better idea than sitting through the silence that's suffocating them. Oddly enough Kibum doesn't seem phased, probably because he's focused on his thoughts from earlier. His back heaves as he lets out a sigh that speaks more than anything he had said that night, and Jonghyun thinks he understands now. And Jonghyun's chest fills with the same hurt - the same dread of the end of summer and the beginning of school, the guilt of wasting their vacation and the notion of 9 to 5 to 9 to 5 to weekends that never feel long enough compared to the months they had off. Jonghyun understands, and it hurts. But he doesn't blame Kibum. 

"Kibum." Jonghyun says out of the blue, somehow sharp in the air nearly making Kibum jump from the sudden noise. Jonghyun winces in embarrassment, but only for a moment. "I like you, too." He says in a softer tone. "I like you a lot, Kibum."

Kibum doesn't look back for a moment, keeping his eyes downcast into the water still as a bashful smile splays across his face. Jonghyun's stomach flips in a much better way than before. The sight of Kibum smiling is almost enough to rid the heavy melancholia of back to school. When Kibum finally meets Jonghyun's eyes again he's hiding his grin behind his thin fingers. "Do you?"

"Yes." Jonghyun says too quickly. "Who doesn't?"

Kibum chuckles, sitting up straight. "Surprisingly there's quite a few people out there who aren't that fond of me." He says, a hint of bitterness in his voice. Jonghyun's gut pangs with a spark of anger. 

"They're fucking insane then." Jonghyun scoffs, making Kibum's smile grow wider. 

"You flatter me, Kim Jonghyun." Kibum drawls, rolling his eyes dramatically. 

Jonghyun smiles. Opening his mouth to say something else - but nothing important enough comes, leaving him sat on the dock, mouth wide around a ridiculous smile as he stares at Kibum, who smiles back with such a wide expression that Jonghyun's heart feels as thought it might burst at any second if he wasn't careful. Because Kibum really is that beautiful, and that funny and caring and interesting - and, God knows how, Kibum, someone with all those qualities, blushes because of what Jonghyun said. Someone like Kibum has to break their staring contest because he's shy around Jonghyun. And the tips of Kibum's ears glow pink as he casts his gaze down to the wood of the dock, too nervous to hold Jonghyun's eyes for any longer. Jonghyun watches his fingers crawl closer to his own as Kibum places his other hand on his cheek so elegantly Jonghyun's nearly convinced he's playing coy, but as he debates the notion Kibum lets out a snort that makes him blush even more, covering his mouth in embarrassment. Jonghyun gets tried of how slow Kibum's fingers inching towards his own, so he grabs his hand, interlocks their fingers, and pulls it into his lap, making Kibum shuffle over. 

Kibum looks up through his lashes at Jonghyun, dark eyes somehow less intimidating now that he had heard the younger man snort so embarrassingly. And as Kibum lowers his hand from his his mouth, his smile fades, not into sadness but into seriousness as Jonghyun inches closer and closer, until he can feel Kibum's breath on his face. Kibum swallows audibly, eyes blown wide to stare at Jonghyun, going cross eyed a bit because of the short distance between the two. And Jonghyun squeezes Kibum's hand once, his face not faltering one bit, and Kibum squeezes back, a non-verbal confession of love - of mutual feelings between them - and of unspoken consent. Jonghyun closes the gap. 

For a moment Jonghyun forgets that they're by the ocean. He forgets about the beautiful scenery and the sound of the waves and the taste of salt in the air. It's hard to remember that anything other than Kibum exists when you're kissing him. It's hard to remember what anything besides hand in his own and Kibum's lips pressed flush against his feels like. Jonghyun doesn't remember what anything besides the taste of Kibum's mouth - diet coke and liquorice, maybe a cigarette or two - and the feeling of his tongue pressed against the inside of his teeth. Jonghyun can't remember anything but the way Kibum sighs into his mouth and the way he sucks on his tongue, and he's not sure he wants to remember anything else anyways. 

 

And as Kibum pulls away with a smile and a tiny gasp for air, his lips are shiny and red and perky as always and his cheeks glow pink and his eyes light up when he finally meets Jonghyun's gaze again. Jonghyun smiles, most of the suns light gone to leave the two young men to try and distinguish each other's features in the dusk. Kibum laughs again, a harsh but heavenly sound that makes Jonghyun wonder how he could have been so worked up and upset just moments before. Kibum laughs and places and small kiss on the corner of Jonghyun's smiling lips. 

"It's dark, we should head back." He says sweetly, fingers still clasped tightly in Jonghyun's lap. 

Jonghyun nods, smiling as Kibum pulls his feet out of the water, temporarily staining the light wood of the dock as he stands up straight. It's nearly dark but Jonghyun still catches a glimpse of Kibum's stomach as he stretches, soft pale skin under his navy tee-shirt that makes Jonghyun's heart swell just that much more. And Jonghyun thinks - as he watches the younger man's face contort into a yawn - he really wouldn't care if he never remembered anything, as long as he could remember Kibum. 

\- END -


End file.
